Something Different

Perhaps I should have used the word "boundaries" instead of "barriers"? I don't know. I was just playing around and worked rather quickly.

This is a collage of three different photos. Mostly I was experimenting and seeing what would happen if I...

This is what happened!

Flow

My professor friend Denise was the first one to introduce me to the concept of flow, as written about by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi in the book titled “Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience.  Here is a link to an explanation of what he is talking about when he talks about flow, http://www.pursuit-of-happiness.org/history-of-happiness/mihaly-csikszentmihaly

My blogging friend Beth posted a video of herself playing piano. As I watching the video, I realized her piano music sounded the way I feel when I am working in Photoshop or out taking pictures with my camera, or gluing pictures and words into my journal to make a collage. Time stops, and there is peace.

It’s a good feeling, particularly when I have serious things on my mind, like dealing with cancer. I’m wondering if any of you experience flow, and how or what it is you do that brings you to that state.

And thank you, Denise and Beth! 

I'm looking forward to more flow opportunities once I'm done with my chemo treatments. When I get disconnected tomorrow, I will have three more treatments left.

Photographs and Memories

Tonight I've been laying around with layers and textures in PSE. I really want to learn more about using masks but it is proving to be  difficult for me. I remember I had a tough time grasping the concept even when I was in school and taking a Photoshop class.

These are tangled leaves skewered on a stick that I saw on my last walk on my trail in the woods. Black and white with a little bit of light on them, possibly proving there is always at least a tiny bit of light available.

And the vine is entangling one leg of the tree, not yet choking it though, possibly proving there is always something to be grateful for.

My art room has been under siege for months now. First we moved a dresser out from there up to the country. That meant I had things emptied out all over the bed. Then my youngest had a couple of friends who stayed several nights in there. That meant my things got emptied out all over the desk and the floor and whatever smooth surface there was available. I got back in there and started trying to organize things a bit. I found a venomous "love letter" note. It is based on a template I got from a substance abuse counselor, basically you work through several emotions and it tends to end up positively. At first I didn't know to whom the note was addressed but I finally figured it out. I hadn't put a date on it, either. I finally figured out who I was writing to but I still don't have a clue as to when I wrote it!

Then I found scraps of paper with half-written poem ideas on them. One was a haiku that went like this:

Waves roll, wash footprints

away. Memories remain,

sparkle like sea glass. 

Playing Around

I have Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday off this week for Mardi Gras. We had a freeze last night and it has been raining most of the day so I will not be partaking in the festivities this year. I have been staying inside like a hermit. I've also been staying up late and sleeping in a little in the mornings. I installed the latest version of Photoshop Elements and have been fiddling around some with that. Here are a few things I've worked on.

 The ice was quickly melting when I finally realized how much there was! I went out and took a few photos with my good camera. Nothing too spectacular but still, fun.

 This is an old one I'd take at a plantation garden in New Iberia. I've added a texture layer and played around with the impressionist brush a bit.

And this one is a donkey I'd seen at the Christmas tree farm. I removed the fence bars in front of his face and did some expressionist painting on him then I added the photo to a larger canvas and put the text below.

Bare Naked Trees

I don't often feel like I get black and white photos right. I played with these a while. I don't particularly like the top one but I do love the moodiness of the bare naked tree below. :) It almost looks like it would reach down and grab you.

Sunday Afternoon

I used the hydrangea from the previous picture and a background page I'd made to create this. I like the way it turned out. Gretchin Rubin is author of The Happiness Project. I've not read the book but I've followed her blog off and on for some time.

Memorial services for our professor who died will be Monday evening so I will be able to attend. I have two doctor's appointments tomorrow, one with the ENT who removed the lump from under my jaw and another one with my regular doctor for a routine checkup. Hopefully the ENT will release me to go back to work. As much as I have enjoyed being home, it's probably time for me to get back to the grindstone!

We went yesterday to visitation for one of my husband's cousins. Lately I feel surrounded by death and decay. I keep saying I don't want to be morbid but I really do need to get a better grasp on the idea of my own mortality. There are other things behind that and I need to get them worked out.

Don't worry, I may be hyper-aware of death and decay but I am also aware of many life-affirming things around me. My vision is somewhat balanced!

Do What You Can...

This one started off with a dictionary page glued to watercolor paper and then painted with the little girl added as a transfer.The last layer was the text which was printed and stained with paint then glued on. I've been thinking I might go back and add a layer of machine stitching around the text paper. I've had trouble with these darker backgrounds trying to figure out how to make the text more readable.

The text says "Do what you can, suffer when you must, love and grow as you are able." Really, what else can we do?

I talked yesterday with someone who was complaining about a mother who was being pushy in trying to get help for her young son who has developmental issues. The mother was angry with the insurance company about not providing for certain services for her son. The mother was pushing on the office that was providing the services. The mother was suffering.

I wondered out loud whether or not the mother was struggling with letting go of the dreams and hopes she had for her son, just beginning to mourn all the things that would not be, and not yet "there" in terms of acceptance so that her battle to help her son was still a little awkward.

The mother is suffering. How does that old saying go, "suffering in inevitable, growth is optional"? I had these flowery thoughts that I hope she grows into her suffering and becomes a formidable advocate for her son. I do hope that happens (and I believe it will). But right now, today, my biggest prayer for her would be that bitterness does not touch her. Because sometimes, when you see suffering lying there on the table, and you start thinking of all the losses and the things that will not be, well at the beginning, you have no way of knowing the good that often comes from suffering. You see the suffering and the loss and you can't imagine that any kind of brightness could come from such loss. But so often, there is brightness. And there will be brightness here, too. She will see it if bitterness does not sneak in and cloud her eyes.

May she more often than not be met with patience and grace on her journey. And may she have more than a few friends along the way who are willing and able to hold the light for her and who are wise enough to gently remind her to "Do what you can, suffer when she must, and grow when you are able."

Magical Extractions

Playing around again. This one is simple and straightforward, just the image of the statue on a background I'd painted and scanned, and then the quote, which is a good one, although for me, it is far easier said than done! Because I have a hard time letting go of what others might think, I sometimes have a hard time allowing myself to be seen.

I used the "magic extractor" tool to pull the statue of the girl out of the original photo. It's too bad we don't have the equivalent of a "magic extractor" tool to pull out our insecurities and such!

Pensive

I've had a run of creativity lately resulting in maybe not the best stuff I've done but still, it's been fun to let go and experiment and just see what happens. This is one of those Photoshop experiments with an azalea picture and my feet and our dog. Oh, yeah, his right eye is from a photo of me.

Fun times, for sure. More to come, I am sure. But now, it's time to head back to work after the 4 day weekend. My art and my blogging do not pay very well, at least not in the currency that is accepted by the mortgage company and the utility companies and the grocery stores, not to mention the gas stations!

The End of Something Great

Playing around with using layers in Photoshop Elements. In this one, there is the drawing of the woman, the "head bowed" cemetery angel, added color to the lips and a photograph of one of my eyes with the blue color added, plus a couple of fairly plain background layers I made. I like how it turned out.

Don't Forget to Breathe

Thinking about why I started this blog in the first place, and asking the question I see a lot of bloggers asking "Is blogging passe`?"

Struggling with how open I want to be here, especially when I feel more often "down" than "up."

Texture Tuesday - Kim Klassen

I signed up a few weeks ago for Kim's Texture Tuesdays giveaways and I am going to try to participate regularly. I miss blogging and maybe this will give me the incentive to at least post once a week. :)

The texture in this picture (on the flower and as the background) is called yesteryear. I have been playing around, trying to create my own textures but mine are not as subtle as these are.

This was an anniversary "thang" for a friend of mine. The flower is a gloriosa lily, grown by my mother. I don't have much of a green thumb!

Locked Heart

A locked heart is a problem. Not too sure I have anything more to say about that. Pain is an inevitable part of life. If you are alive, you will get hurt. And if you keep your heart all locked up to "protect" it from being hurt, the next thing you know, it is ruined from being locked up all the time.

I've been sketching a bit. I am not the greatest at doing it but it's enjoyable to me. I usually go into Flickr and choose some poor unsuspecting subject there to sketch. It never ends up looking exactly right but that is okay too.

Dance Reworded :)

Changed the wording a bit.

Dance

I sometimes have the problem of trying to dance in the way I think the other person wants me to dance rather than making my own choices. I lose my own music when I do that. . .

(I don't know by the words on the photo that my meaning is clear. I just got up this morning and did this one. I suppose I will have to think about it some more during the day. A revision may be coming.)