Dreams of the Heart

Today we went to "the country." We have a little land where my grandparents' lived. Their house is still there, but it has fallen into serious disrepair over the years (Hurricane Rita dropped a huge oak tree on the porch and since no one lived in the house the oak tree was never completely removed). We also have a small house we moved onto the property back in the late seventies, when we were both working and before we had children.

Then we moved off to Houston and didn't use the house very much. My parents still went up there occasionally but when my grandmother died, they quit going so much to spend the night and the house fell into disuse. We moved back to Louisiana in the early nineties and subsequently went through a lot of emotional turmoil and tight finances and the house sunk further into disrepair.

My husband and I would talk and dream about fixing it up again and using it as a weekend retreat. Sometimes we would talk about selling it and my heart always got a little sad when we talked that way. We've talked some more and we are going to try to get some things done around the house and get it fixed up so we can use it again. It's a bit scary to think about because it will be a stretch financially and it will take both of us being committed to the idea to get it all done.

We went today to talk to my uncle about doing some of the repairs. He is a carpenter and can do the things we can not do.

We also visited with one of his sons today who invited us to walk the path through the woods to his house to see his pigs. He has chickens too. :)

It's a different world back in those woods and things move at a different pace. I don't know that I'd like living there full time but I am looking forward to being able to go there on the weekends again. I hope it all works out. I hope I can be satisfied if it does not work out. Sometimes I fear I hang too fiercely onto what we once had there.

We walked the land a little bit today too, once we got through admiring the pigs and visiting. Everything near my grandparents' house is so grown up. We walked through briars and small bushes and trees to go all around the house and back to the building that used to be the tractor shed and my grandmother's chicken coop.

This is the window to the back bedroom at my grandparents' house. There were two double beds back here and before we bought and moved "the little house" in, this is where we'd sleep when we came. I have so many happy memories of being here when I was young and also as a young married adult.