Saturday, November 08, 2014

A Poem (of sorts) and Voices of Friends After a Dark Night

Wide awake at 2:38 a.m. might be one of the scariest, darkest, loneliest experiences in the world. I'm back to sitting up at my laptop, trying to also move around a bit more.Working on making the necessary changes to keep my gut from hurting with the tension of all the adjustments I need to make. Sometimes, doctors don't tell their patients all they need to know, and they are left scrambling to figure things out.

Given Truths

#1: Low moments come.
#2: You're gonna need some help. It's okay to ask.
#3: Sometimes, acknowledging the darkness is enough to send it packing.
#4: If not, find yourself a safe place to scream, whine and b*tch without the need to feel perky. 


I'm having trouble adjusting to the dietary changes that are necessary after my surgery. It's a matter of seeing what works for my body. It's like walking around with a bit of a tummy ache all the time, because you aren't feeding your tummy what comforts it and helps its little feelings. Food in the South is a source of comfort and love and eating is a way of enjoying life. My tummy is not at all happy, most of the time. I told my family earlier today that it is distraught, and misses its little colon friend. I don't know how to comfort my tummy.


I should soon know what stage my cancer is in, and will have an idea of what further treatment I will have to endure. I'm told my body will adapt. I even know of some folks whose bodies have adapted. I'll keep you posted. I've been told I'm courageous. My aim here is to be as vulnerable and honest as I can be. I would appreciate your prayers and holding the light for me. Even in the depths of darkness, there is light and love that will carry us through those times.


  1. Your tummy wonders why it can't have what it wants if the colon has a problem.

    All your bits need to get together to work out a new normal.

    In the meantime, I have hold of your hand and your heart.

  2. I am SO hearing you on the southern food thing. Yep.

  3. With you in prayer, Annie...

  4. Yes that is how we eat. I am sorry that your tummy's feelings are hurt. Thank you for being vulnerable for us. We are all right here.

  5. Holding you in the light my friend.

  6. Annie, glad to hear from you. Have been thinking of you and praying and will continue to do so.

    All week, I've been up at or anywhere between 1:30 and 4:00 a.m. I think we might be in the same time zone so know that someone else is awake and thinking of you.


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